I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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