We won't sleep together?
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Randomize
