Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Randomize
