I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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