Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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