are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
