The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Randomize
