It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
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