don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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