butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Randomize
