grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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