How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
