Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
