Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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