im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
