i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
