I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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