oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
