I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
