Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
