No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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