drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
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