do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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