my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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