I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize