After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize