Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
My life is pants optional.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
