only if we run a train.
done.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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