We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Randomize