I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
