ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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