Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Randomize
