Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Randomize
