You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
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