How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
why does every cop we meet know your name?
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