Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
There's always time for handjobs
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
