I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Randomize
