he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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