I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
