and you said cock pushups were impossible
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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