You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
