i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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