Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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