I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
