Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
