Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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