I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
