We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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