Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
