You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
