He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
